Tuesday, June 28, 2005
5:02 PM
its the second day of school ever since school started..got back gate for duty and its freaking boring back there..oh well..i didnt get caught for my hair and everyone is asking why..haha like hello!!they all seem to want me to get caught la..haha cause almost everyone with short hair got it..haha oh well..school have been fine so far..track too..but i think i pulled my ham string..its either a pull or a strain..whatever it is,its bad..sigh..i hate it..we train hard but we get all this injury..yeah i just the saying 'No pain No gain' is true..my competition is next week.i wana do the relays..but im not sure..esther is probably gona be the one..nvm..i still have next year..i guess?sigh..okay whatever..i'll just pray that i can at least get into the semis for 100..even if i cant..i must get at least top 20..okay i better not hope for so much..leg hurts like fuck everytime i walk up stairs..they should stop home room for me..hahaha!okay enough bull shit..bye.
be my princess,i promise you i'll give you the world.
if only you knew.
Sunday, June 26, 2005
12:53 AM
yay!i finally got all the pictures up!haha!there
http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2124712845
okay i had a hard time getting those up esp for a idiot who is bad at htmls and who dont even do her blog stuff herself..okay anyway enjoy the photos!:)
today was good!haha sentosa with ateeqah was cancelled so i went on with my fellow track mates and im so glad i did:)))we had truck loads of fun and okay the photos were stupid but you'll only understand if your there..mom had to wake me up at 830 today..and she herself didnt know why she woke me up?!?haha i was suppose to wake up at 9 and yes half an hour is alot to me!!i only slept at 3am so yeah..haha anyway i finally went to get my IC done since april..haha after that went to town with mommy dear and met up with my favorite aunt ann for lunch..we shop for awhile and they both pulle me into blush..haha thank god jaey called me and i left quickly after saying my goodbyes..haha met jaey and zoey at the mrt station and jaey made me wait so long so maria and andrea ended up waiting for us too..it was all jaey's fault..hahahaha!okay anyway i dont know why but i kept saying FUCK today..im so dead..haha i gotto stop..its rude..but..hahaha i seem to be loving it..as in saying the word..haha okay so we met up at harbour and we took a cab to sentosa.
we got there and we looked for the rest and they were all wet..haha we all gave stupid excuse not to go in but andrea ended up wet..haha soon esther,olive and anissa came along..haha so im not that bad la..haha they came later..hahaha not many turn up for this thingie but we all still had fun:))))) i had fun catching fish and ahem..crabs but you see jaey kept getting into maria and my way..hahahha she scare all the fishes and crabs away with her scream..haha but the sea weeds really annoyed the shit outta maria and i...haha they were so gross okay..haha anyway we caught a baby sotong!and maria melon has it..i hope she takes care of him:((hahaha okay i got alil bit darker and my face isnt cherry red but its alil pink:))haha okay we all left at around 7?yeah went to meet mom and we both shopped alil more..she got so many things with my aunt!!haha she got two shoes and a bottom and..i cant remember what else la..haha yeah..anyway we both went to pick dad up and went for dinner..didnt go with the track girls for dinner..no fun:(haha oh well..okay all i have to say is that i had lotsa fun today:)cheers!
Friday, June 24, 2005
12:23 PM
training soon..i had a horrible dream yesterday..it was bad and thats all i know..haha anyway i woke up at 12 today thank God mom called me or i wouldnt be up till God knows what time..training later at 3 and its raining now..gotto carry that bag of cones..im gona be one clumsy ass again..haha i still have my homework that i've not done and im only rushing thru it this sunday for bio and chinese..well for chinese thats if i can even read the Qns..haha i bet only one or two girls will do chinese home work..bio would be easy cause i've done most of it already..oh wait..great i dont have paper to write my ans on..just great..this always happens..haha okay anyway i hope training wouldnt be tough today..all i know is that we're gona be doing the relays..oh well..okay i cant wait to get home and come on tonight..its friday and i can stay up all night again!:)))okay till then..cheers!
Thursday, June 23, 2005
11:04 PM
had another hair cut today with mother dear..haha she looks good with her new hair cut!haha she looks younger..haha okay she already does look young for her age..i have really little hair now..i hardly feel anything when i wash my hair..haha okay i cant wait for sentosa this sat..thats if its still on la..anyway i realise alot of people is starting to put passwords on for their blogs?haha oh well..no more blog hopping for me:(okay track tml..fun!:)okay i hope it'll be fun..haha i dont feel like blogging anymore..cheers!:)
Wednesday, June 22, 2005
9:50 PM
today was good i guess?woke up cause ms clara chai had to text me..haha anyway woke up and rot infront of the tv till mom called and asked if i wana go out for lunch so we went out for lunch together.did my F&N homework..and im gettin annoyed with it..i doubt she's gona be happy with my work anyway..okay i dont really feel like updating so bye.:)
Tuesday, June 21, 2005
9:46 PM
my dear mother was being as ass..someone called for me and she said "oh mabel's not home she went for facial"i wanted to kill her!haha she's being an idiot okay..argh..but i do wonder who called..tried asking her and this was her reply"girl la"then i said"DUH!"then she said"yeah then..boy ah?so now you got boyfriend eh?it sounded like a boy.who is the boy"my mother is so silly okay..i mean..do i seriously look like i talk to boys..or erm..even like them??HAHA okay im having a bad day starting from now..talking to samm haha who is probably going to die helping me with something..haha anyway today's training wasnt what i expected at all..it was just taking our timing for the event that we're doing..did a few times of 400 x 1 too..haha leslie says esther's starting is good but ending is bad..my starting isnt good and my ending is good..haha it was funny la..anyway beatrice came today!!:))))haha i missed training with her actually..haha i did my 100 with her and she dropped!haha and she knows that..but she's still good:)and im still scared of her..haha anyway she scared me when we did our last 400 x 1..she couldnt breath and was tearing..i was like'aye!calm down!breath in and out slowly'haha it was really funny..
no training till friday..i think i got a pull..fuck it..shall ice it..hmm my body is breaking apart la..haha
and i dont know why..but that one song is stuck in my damn head now..and cause of that..all i think is........you.
but i guess she'll never ever know im even a human that lives in this world
Monday, June 20, 2005
11:00 PM
my show just ended..three more till the end..not what im looking forward to..have been thinking about some things just now..and i guess..maybe i should stop.sigh.cheers
9:56 PM
was watching buffy while changing channels today and it was a really sweet moment..haha the way they say it la..
Buffy:angel i need a break..after all that have happen.
Angel:im sorry i..
Buffy:please-and starts walking out-
Angel:will you still be my girl?
Buffy:always-smiles-
i dont know why but i cant stop thinking.
3:37 PM
this is my 3rd time blogging today..haha clara is full of fucked up shit and clara says she's having a bad day and 4 days seems like forever thanks to hayl i hear that almost every hour now..haha and clara claims i have a good radio..she's singing one of my favorite song:) bad day by daniel powter..haha she is bored and crappy..and she keeps saying'now you know why i have no boyfriend?cause im irritating'she's crazy now..the girl who goes crazy over peanuts..haha madness.she's screaming over the phone like a loser..haha but never the less she is a great entertainer and ahem..radio..haha
clean my closet already and coffee was staring at me half the time..she's so adorable alright..haha and yes maria she is still having that fur problem..haha and maria is feeling very watermelon-ish today..hahaha she feels like eating water melon..no yello melons okay cause they are fake!hahahaha!okay enough of the melon school lame-ness..haha okay there's desperate house wives tonight!haha shall get mom to get ice-cream..okay wait..better not..i dont want to grow fat..okay sigh sad life i have..i feel like going for a party now which would end like 2am or something and i would love to drink..alot..yes..i feel like drinking and having a party:)))
still waiting.
2:05 PM
daniel powter-bad day
Where is the moment we needed the most
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost
They tell me your blue skies fade to grey
They tell me your passion's gone away
And I don't need no carryin' on
You stand in the line just to hit a new low
You're faking a smile with the coffee to go
You tell me your life's been way off line
You're falling to pieces everytime
And I don't need no carryin' on
Cause you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day
You had a bad day
Well you need a blue sky holiday
The point is they laugh at what you say
And I don't need no carryin' on
You had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day
(Oh.. Holiday..)
Sometimes the system goes on the brink
And the whole thing turns out wrong
You might not make it back and you know
That you could be well oh that strong
And I'm not wrong
So where is the passion when you need it the most
Oh you and I
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost
Cause you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
You've seen what you like
And how does it feel for one more time
You had a bad day
You had a bad day
Had a bad day
Had a bad day
Had a bad day
Had a bad day
Had a bad day
1:54 PM
im faking a smile with a coffee to go.
today its gona be a boring day..no track cause its tml instead i dont understand why either..if they have it today then we all wouldnt feel so tired during training cause we didnt wake up early for orals..orals its tml wish me luck people..mum asked me to clear up the mess in rooms..that includes the mess i hide inside the closet..i hate cleaning up cause before i know,it'll be messy again..woke up at 12 but lay in bed thinking till 1230..hmm just me and my silly thoughts again..okay shall stop here for now..cheers people.
and i shall wait for my turn if it ever comes.
12:05 AM
i so hate myself.im such a loser!!argh!if i want something i should go get it.but i didnt have the fucking guts!argh..i really hate myself!!i hate mabelina cheah!she is a loser..
okay that was how i felt..cause of something..which clara would so kill me if she learns about it..haha okay im a loser okay..argh..okay enough of that..not like im not feeling depress enough..listening to james blunt your beautiful and its on repeat..it makes me think of that adorable face..haha okay joyceh my girlfriend will know what i mean..she's just such a pretty baby..but like the lyrics if your beautiful..sigh it tells how i feel la..so here goes....
ps:to idiots who think im talking about someone from school your damn wrong cause it isnt.
james blunt-your beautiful
My life is brilliant.
My love is pure.
I saw an angel.
Of that I'm sure.
She smiled at me on the subway.
She was with another man.
But I won't lose no sleep on that,
'Cause I've got a plan.
You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw you face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.
Yeah, she caught my eye,
As we walked on by.
She could see from my face that I was,
Fucking high,
And I don't think that I'll see her again,
But we shared a moment that will last till the end.
You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw you face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.
You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
There must be an angel with a smile on her face,
When she thought up that I should be with you.
But it's time to face the truth,
I will never be with you.
Sunday, June 19, 2005
2:58 PM
woke up at 12 today but i still wanted more sleep..mum came into the room and kicked my foot..that woke me up alright..haha yeah anyway we cleaned the house today as usual..called marilyn and have yet to call melissa..its father's day and i bet they both have wished dad happy father's day thru msg or the phone..im in s'pore with him yet i've not even wish him..i cant..i dont know why..i just feel funny..at least i cooked him lunch..his favorite duck noodle..with lots of fish cake and crab meat..haha so after all im nice..haha i cooked his present..okay enough crap..
coffee darling is dropping fur..alot..and i've got fur all over just hugging her..haha poor girl we'll have to lock her up..mum keeps saying im fat..and its annoying me..haha she keeps thinking she have put on weight too..okay firstly..i cant lose weight even if i want to..i train 3 times a week!i'll die in no time if i still skip my meals..i've learnt my lesson last friday when i didnt have lunch and went for track..my gastric problems are here to stay..they'll get real bad everytime i skip a meal..mum says'i cant eat anything else but fruits on sundays or i'll grow fat'i couldnt help but laugh at my silly mother..haha she already have a good figure for someone her age what more can she ask for eh?my mom is always asking me weird qns like..am i weird mabel?she asked me that in the car and i was like HAHAHAH WHAT?!??she makes me laugh alot as my mom i would say..but never the less..i still love her:)))she must have talked to marilyn about my damn grades..cause she talked about it just now when we were chatting over the phone..not really something i like talking about with them..but oh well..speaking of my grades..im worried for my chinese orals..oh wait..was it chinese or english that we're having??great i cant remember..haha oh whatever it is..im gona make the teacher laugh during the chinese orals..haha i still remember chess and i were saying that we shall got to the teacher and say we dont know a single word,just fail us..haha that was last year..and liwei and i cheated in a way with the express girls..cause they made us sit right beside each other so we asked one another how the heck to read some of those weird chinese words..haha it was funny..i shouldnt be doing all those but hello..im not angel though i check your damn uniform when truth is i dont really care if your belt is at your butt..just put on your name tag and take it off later..i dont care..haha
mum wants to go to my second "home"later on..thats if she finish her ironing in time..haha oh my second home is giant btw..not really a place i love going but oh well..haha okay thats all..cheers!:)
Saturday, June 18, 2005
10:39 PM
life is so unpredictable..the way things goes..you may think you know what's gona happen next but actually,you dont.thats life..it comes and you have to accept it whether you like it or want it..hmm life....
today was overall find though simone and i didnt say..laugh alot?haha it was suppose to be a laughing day out but we didnt do stupid things cause you see,my stupid pants was dropping with every step i took..i looked stupid but who cares!haha i walked out of the house feeling it was alright..but the min i started walking to the mrt i felt it going down..but i didnt expect it would get worst..not at all..but it got way outta hand..it was dropping and i had to walk around town and i repeat,town,with one or both hands holding the damn pants up..it was annoying..but oh well..life..haha..okay anyway steph came along and later we all headed to adora's place and rot there looking at adora being retarded..haha anyway i think my parents wants to get a new car?i dont know..they went shopping without me after picking granny up from the airport..was suppose to meet them there but i bump into maryanne and ravinder so i decided to stay in town and head home with them instead of going to the airport though i would love the long mrt ride!!haha oh and i bumped in zenn eng!!!!haha she was the last person i would have ecpected to bump into!!haha she was with her sister..haha i was so shock and so was she!haha:))))))))))i've missed talking to her this holis..haha okay now i cant wait to get back to school to see everyone..gwen,steff and all..haha i miss them all..everyone..haha okay its cleaning of the damn house tml..hate it..argh..cheers!
i didnt see you in the crowd no matter how hard i looked.
12:15 AM
okay lets see..slept at 2plus and woke up at 11 plus..haha actually i was suppose to wake up at 10..but i couldnt get out of my bed i was just too lazy and simply just too tired..okay anyway..training was under mr sng..so it wasnt bad..cause he dont scream like leslie does..but its bad in a way too la..anyway i nearly pull my muscle today..mr sng kinda scolded me and got me to stop for a lil while cause he saw what happen..anyway..he hopes to train us more often to "kill"us..haha his funny..anyway tml out with simone and maybe clara and hayl..haha poor girl has class from 1 to 7!ahha anyway they both came over just now at around 8plus..haha and clara is crazy over coffee..but she calls her everything else but her name,coffee.what an idiot..hayl and i were laughing alot at her she was just being herself la..a retard but a really good entertainer i'd say..haha we orded pizza and were really full after eating so much..they left at around 10plus and now im here online..haha being an idiot..simone knows why..haha no simone dont say anything..haha yes okay i cant wait for my wonderful layout!haha its in the process baby!:)anyway mum made me put on this mask which makes me not being able to move my mouth:(i look like yushan during camp when she put on her mask and scare the shit outta everyone..it was funny..haha how i scared ms goh and ended up following her everywhere cause i scared her...haha okay thats all..cant wait to go out tml!:))))cheers!
hope i'll see you in the crowd you pretty face:)
Friday, June 17, 2005
12:22 PM
she was,truly beautiful.:)
james blunt-your beautiful
My life is brilliant.
My love is pure.
I saw an angel.
Of that I'm sure.
She smiled at me on the subway.
She was with another man.
But I won't lose no sleep on that,
'Cause I've got a plan.
You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw you face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.
Yeah, she caught my eye,
As we walked on by.
She could see from my face that I was,
Fucking high,
And I don't think that I'll see her again,
But we shared a moment that will last till the end.
You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw you face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.
You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
There must be an angel with a smile on her face,
When she thought up that I should be with you.
But it's time to face the truth,
I will never be with you.
Thursday, June 16, 2005
5:37 PM
okay today i showered coffee and the hairdryer broke down on me twice!!okay i was so pissed off..but looking at that silly innocent face i cooled down..haha but coffee was naughty today..she kept moving about while i was trying to get the knots out..her fur was horrible la..it have been about 2 weeks since i last shower her?haha yeah so she really did stink..anyway i finally finish at 3 and have been sitting infront of the computer till now..im so bored..maria,joyceh and i have created new accounts for msn..haha and maria have been talking about melons..alot..okay camp soon maria..melon school camp..haha thats so stupid okay..anyway im so bored..mum isnt coming home for dinner..so its my dad and i..im so not looking forward to that thank you..oh and maria have labelled me as the retard and she's the idiot..haha that was how bored we both were this afternoon..anyway okay as you can tell..i have nothing more to say..maria dont get ego please..haha cause i blogged about you..oh and maria..type in the message box idiot not the second one!ahhahahaha cheers!:)
Wednesday, June 15, 2005
11:28 PM
training was okay it wasnt tough at all..it was all about speed i would say?it was tough for yi ting,yushan and i to keep it down and lower then chu yin's group..i was close to death cause my shins are killing me..anyway i just caught mr leslie on tv..hahaha it was so funny..okay now clara's dad is entertaining me with all his elvis songs!hahaha its damn funny cause he is like clara..singing but not really knowing the lyrics..haha but he sounds like elvis..hahaha its super funny..we couldnt stop laughing..okay i just had two super nice chocolate chip cookie mom got back from the cellar door..haha its good!watched charmed today and wyatte is SO cute okay!!i love him!haha he is just super cute..haha okay at least i think thats how the name is spelled..haha okay clara's dad wouldnt stop singing now..haha clara is irritated..okay and her dad nearly found out about her darling boy..hahaha okay she's so gona kill me..haha okay tml im gona shower stinky coffee and maybe go to the club to soak myself..with eloise and the the other 2?thats if they're coming..chu yin cant make it!!:(what a let down..they all cancelled one by one..haha i wanted to go to adora's place instead..but i gotto shower coffee..an order from the mother..haha okay so im gona be good and stay home..training is cancelled cause leslie thinks that chu yin,joy and i should rest..haha cause only three of us said we'll come for relays..but we're all aching everywhere..ahha anything for the relays thats what i'll say..its the one that is going to bring a medal to our old man's cap..yes mr zender:)his like a grandfather to me..since i've never seen any of my grandfathers..okay anyway out with simone this sat!!:)mom is gona have facial again..haha okay cheers!im outta here
12:54 PM
i couldnt sleep again yesterday night!it was so irritating..anyway i only fell asleep at 2?or maybe later..oh well..woke up at 1030 today..track is at 3....i dont feel like training..this whole week he said training is gona be really heavy..that means,tough..that means..i die..the last training i had i didnt give anything at all..it was bad performance due to lack of sleep..ahha see sleeping is important..cass and i were so dead the last training..she came late cause she didnt wana train,nice try we all still had to run our guts out..only i didnt have guts to give..okay enough of my shit and rubbish..mum have been a pain these few days..nagging at me all day which isnt doing me any good..its just driving me up the wall..anyway i didnt want to sleep in the air-con but the princess-coffee wanted to sleep with air-con or she wouldnt stop licking and poking me and she also wouldnt stop walking around just to piss me off..so i gave up..i on the damn thing for her..she's so fussy!haha okay spoiled by me what can i say..gtg for track soon and im really sooo lazy..wana take a cab..but i cant..no cash..argh!okay enough shit..cheers!
Tuesday, June 14, 2005
8:42 PM
today was just hell fun!:)was with debbie poon the whole day and all day we went shopping and eating like we've not eaten in days!haha we had all our meals at marche!haha acting like rich kids..and we couldnt stop laughing cause we were both being idiots!haha we walked around town and went to suntec and we went to royal sporting house and we just grabbed the stuff we want and put it at the counter..i ended up getting a top and a pair of socks for her..two top and a pants and socks!hahaha i love that nike top i got..haha debbie is booking me on the last week of the holis for our last outting..haha its fun to meet her every june holi to have fun like that..we just go crazy and all..ahha its that kinda fun which you cant explain..anyway cant wait for our next outting..haha oh and joyceh if your reading this..im planning to go to the beach before the holidays end..yes anyway i need to study..CSI is on soon and i cant stand it..the tv is making me lose sleep..i've been watch channel 10 to 12 these few days..ahha okay im a happy kid today and thats all i can say..way too happy..out with simone soon..and yes..let's just hope my mother wouldnt spoil my plan..i'll die..cheers people!oh i saw charlotte today!!ahhaha:))))))))))))))
Sunday, June 12, 2005
4:43 PM
okay im back again..im super bored..i've never felt so bored before..the old man just came home with durains..eww i hate the smell..okay anyway why cant he stay out all day..that will help me alot..haha okay have been on the phone and the net the whole day..was looking through friendster and random people's photos blar blar..haha i made clara feel stupid yesterday and today..she and her K&K brothers..hahahaha okay inside joke..we have been listening to the songs her dad d/l and she tried to sing them..but as usual she failed..cow dont sing clara..ahhahaha he go moo moo moo..hahahahaha okay im bored..my butt is probably flat now..have been sitting on this chair since 2?im not sure i woke up at 12plus 1..slept at 2plus 3 yesterday..wonder if cass and all had the same problem..hmmm okay was suppose to go out with debbie but o told her to go out with her family instead..felt bad to take her away though she dont really wana go out with them..ahha she only wants to go out with them cause she is afraid that her mom would buy her sister stuff and she wont get any..stupid girl..ahha we caught up alot today..she is booking me on tues and thur..haha crazy lil thing..anyway before that was suppose to go with chess,joyceh and nisha to watch the hockey game but i didnt want to in the end cause martin might be there..wait she will be there..ahha yes okay anyway im still bored..coffee have been sleeping there the whole day..piggy..i really have to shower her but im really lazy..but she stinks like hell..hhaha sigh lets see..whats on tml?track?ahha oh that means more of that innocent girl..hahaha jiarui will know who im talking about..ahhaha okay bye.cheers!
1:35 PM
okay its been somtimes since i last update..have been really busy lately with track cause of the wings competition which turn out well:)the last day was yesterday day..saw that innocent girl jumping..she didnt make it though:(oh well..i did 4 x 100 and right after that i went to report for 4 x 400..was dead tired after the 400 i couldnt stand up..my butt had acid which is like having cramps but at your butt muscles..they hurt like hell..thanks to those who helped me stand up:)the race was a good one..we all did very well and im one happy kid walking home with my super big glup..had cup noodles for dinner cause mum went for paul's wedding dinner..i was praying that dad wouldnt be home but he was..that just spoiled my whole day..but i was nice okay..i offered him my cup noodles..hahaha but he didnt want it..okay today mum went out and left me all alone with that grumpy old man..but he's gona go out and then i'll be home alone!:)i like being home alone..okay anyway mum gave me a 100 bucks to spend at world of sports..i love her!:)okay anyway i feel so lazy to do anything..i think i ate something wrong too..have been going to the toilet..haha okay anyway im bored..thats all for now..cheers!:)
Friday, June 10, 2005
12:32 PM
mum thought i went missing yesterday like ran away from home?hmm she must be guilty..hahaha thats just bull..i was running till nearly 10 yesterday night..the meet got pushed back..she tried calling and i didnt pick up..so she called chess and chess i suppose,called the "whole"world..mum got everyone worried..but i've already said sorry..cause i really thought she knew i was running..but i didnt know it was 9plus when i finish..my bad..okay anyway..leslie was really happy with the sprinters..im really proud of rachel that "loser"and nicolette[sp?]i told her during her race..i shouted remember the curve!and she nodded!!!hahaha germ and i was like laughing..but she remembered about the curve and came in 3rd?i cant remember..but she was REALLY good..and esther came in first from behide!haha okay im so proud of all of them..myself?he said i did a really good race..but i know i could have done better if not for that false start..but oh well..im not gona talk about it as its over..im gona improve on it:)okay training is later..he is thinking of putting me in 4 by 400 so he can send two teams..and my ans is NO!!cause i cant do a freaking 400 for nuts..i'll drag the whole team down and i dont want to feel crappy..anyway my legs are hurting from all the running i've been doing since wed..there's track later at 3..dont feel like going..i only woke up at 12 this morning cause i couldnt sleep last night though i was so tired..oh and i was watching lost..haha okay thats all now..cheers:)
Thursday, June 09, 2005
12:25 PM
my competition is starting soon..i cant wait!:)but i slept late yesterday cause i was watching my dvd which sucked alot..the ending was just crap alright..argh what a waste of my life*argh!anyway i only got to fall asleep at 12plus 1?but thank God they stopped the drilling already!!!!i got to sleep till 10 thats when my phone went off but i simply just throw it to the bottom of the bed..haha woke up at 11 cause i have no choice..gotto eat my food on time and i didnt take my med again!haha mom is so gona kill me if she finds out that i haven been taking my med..okay shall blog again later..cheers!
Wednesday, June 08, 2005
10:35 PM
nice song i found thanks to hamster.:)
how to deal
Sometimes a man has to choose
And do something he doesn't wanna do
Do I live my life with you as my wife
Or do I go on and pursue my lifetime dream
I gotta do this for me
Cuz if I don't I'll probably regret it
But if I don't I'll probably regret it
How do I cope
How do you cope when
The one you love is with somebdoy else
And there's nothing you could do about it
How do I deal with
The fact that you had a chance
But you chose to turn away for your career
I gotta take it though it's heartbreakin'
It's something that I had to do
But nobody said that it would hurt so bad
So how to I live...how do I deal without you
It's killing me to know
That your heart hurts with me
But you're with him cause I chose
To be in this industry
Money, shows, and hoes come along with luxury and pain
Is all you see when you think about it
But this is the life that I was given
So I have to live it to the fullest
But how do I deal in the meantime without you
How do you cope when
The one you love is with somebdoy else
And there's nothing you could do about it
How do I deal with
The fact that you had a chance
But you chose to turn away for your career
I gotta take it though it's heartbreakin'
It's something that I had to do
But nobody said that it would hurt so bad
So how to I live...how do I deal without you
9:50 PM
okay lets see..they started drilling at 9 today!!!i was so angry okay!!!they've waking me up from my beauty sleep in lalaland ever since..er..i cant remember actually..haha oh well..im having my 100m competition tml for wings..wish me luck!im gona win this one..okay actually wait till i see who im running with..hahaha yes thats what i said and they all started laughing at me..oh well..up till now..im still not too sure if im in the relay team for wings..he may put me in..but it'll be because beatrice..i think he saw the disappointment on my face when he kept talking about beatrice..cause he said i've improved blar blar..its his b'day tml..we all plan to do something for him:)oh and track bbq is happening this friday..haha WATERMELON HERE I COME!!ahhahaha no dont get the wrong idea..its an inside joke for both maria and i..haha a big inside joke..HA HA!okay anyway i feel dizzy all of a sudden.......okay im better now..i think blood must have stopped flowing into my pea brain for a sec..haha oh talking about blood..i bursted a vain in my palm..ahha they were hitting the baton too hard..so it just bursted and i couldnt really move my hand but now..its like a blue black which doesnt hurt..im bullying samm online now..HAHA yes yes im mean..ahha okay im gona be nice and hang the clothes out for mother dear so we all can watch that dvd..like AT LAST!ahha okok cheers people!:)
Tuesday, June 07, 2005
9:11 PM
When it comes i'll know. okay let's see..no tv shows tonight and i cant watch that dumb dvd dad got cause why?mum says i have to be nice and wait for him to watch it or he'll get mad..like i actually care?okay but i'll feel bad so i have to wait up for him:(anyway i brought coffee down for walk just now and it was really nice seeing that blue sky with patches of black clouds everywhere..i thought it was gona rain cause the wind was alil strong too..but i doubt it will:( i want it to rain..i like rainy days..haha that reminds me how i use to get debbie into trouble for playing in the rain..those were seriously the days when i was always happy..okay anyway..i've been updating so much i have nothing much to say..so cheers! -simone if you see this please drop me a text or something alright?cheer up please..
5:13 PM
This is how you remind me.
Never made it as a wise man
I couldn't cut it as a poor man stealin'
Tired of livin' like a blind man
I'm sick inside without a sense of feelin'
And this is how you remind me
This is how you remind me
Of what I really am
This is how you remind me
Of what I really am
It's not like you to say sorry
I was waiting on a different story
This time I'm mistaken
For handing you a heart worth breakin'
I've been wrong, I've been down
To the bottom of every bottle
Despite words in my head
Scream "Are we having fun yet?"
Yet?, Yet?, Yet?, no no
It's not like you didn't know that
I said I love you and I swear I still do
It must have been so bad
'Cause living with me must have damn near
killed you
This is how you remind me
Of what I really am
This is how you remind me
Of what I really am
It's not like you to say sorry
I was waiting on a different story
This time I'm mistaken
For handing you a heart worth breakin'
I've been wrong, I've been down
To the bottom of every bottle
Despite words in my head
Scream "Are we having fun yet?"
Yet?, Yet?, Yet?, no no
Never made it as a wise man
I couldn't cut it as a poor man stealing
And this is how you remind me
This is how you remind me
This is how you remind me
Of what I really am
This is how you remind me
Of what I really am
It's not like you to say sorry
I was waiting on a different story
This time I'm mistaken
For handing you a heart worth breakin'
I've been wrong, I've been down
To the bottom of every bottle
Despite words in my head
Scream "Are we having fun yet?"
Yet?, Yet?, Yet?, no no
2:14 PM
woke up at 930 again because of the stupid drilling thats taking place downstairs..its driving me crazy!its so hard to do anything..anyway woke up and just laze around..after that showered and went to do an hour of maths like i promised to..gotto keep to the plan to be in the nationals..sad life i have..its studies and track..boring..suppose to go swim with chuyin and the rest but i guess its called off?dont feel like going out either..just wana stay home and laze around..gona have track tml..and he wants to link up the relay team for wings i suppose?beatrice cant make it for this meet cause of some church camp..he doesnt seem to have any faith in us at all..oh well..cass is down with an eye illness?haha whatever it is..she better be back soon..the drilling is still going on..its of no help to me at all..yet my lil darling coffee is still sleeping so soundly..need to shower her soon but im too lazy!!i just wana chill..big field anyone?oh gona go for a bus ride on friday hopefully..okay im bored..gtg study again soon-pouts..i hate it but i gotto do it..what a life..cant wait to get out:)
im okay maybe just a little torn but im okay:)
40 kinds of sadness
Two days chasing me around
I go crazy when you're outside of my world
When you're outside of my world
No sounds singing me to sleep
I don't want the room to breathe
Just be with me...
Just be with me!
I feel 40 kinds of sadness when you're gone.
I feel the same thing always happens when you're gone
And i know you're just around the corner
But just around the corner is not enough
It's not enough
My eyes are waiting at the door
Just like every time before
Time flies so slow...
Time flies so slow!
[Chorus]
I feel 40 kinds of sadness when you're gone.
I feel the same thing always happens when you're gone
And i know you're just around the corner
But just around the corner is not enough
It's not enough
It's not enough, I don't know why
It's not enough, I miss you all the time
And I know you kinds like it.
[Chorus]
I feel.. yea.. 40 kinds of sadness when you're gone.
I feel 40 kinds of sadness when you're gone.
I feel the same thing always happens when you're gone
i know you're just around the corner
But just around the corner is not enough
It's not enough
Monday, June 06, 2005
10:59 PM
my world of darkness.
had training today..the sun wasnt out so it wasnt too bad..but there was the wind which made rachel said'shit!'and started running hell fast..that idiot..haha she was wispering something into my ears which i so didnt need to know..haha i shall be nice and not talk about it here..oh she was being gross looking at some guy's balls at the bus stop with the sec 1s..no comments..haha training wasnt too bad today cause of the wings competition we're gona have on thur and sat..and sat im suppose to go out!!nvm..doubt i'll get into finals..and i dont think i wana do four by one..not like im in it la..haha okay im having a really bad head ache and my eyes hurt like fuck..feel like taking them out..that would be fun..i can pop them on as and when i like..okay sickness mabel..its 1126 and im bored..oh well..im tired.cheers.
11:15 AM
went shopping with mom yesterday again..till kinda late but we would have stayed later just that she has to work so we headed home around 9plus 10..she went to zara,guess and fcuk to try all the clothes while i just sit there and watch in the dressing room..no not in the same one as her..i hold all her shopping and waited outside..she bought two top from zara and some other stuff from god knows where..and me?no..i got nothing..its always that case..and mum said this'its cause your thinking instead of shopping'and i just kept quiet..she hit the spot so i couldnt say anything..and she asked when i was gona wear all this girly stuff cause she is willing to invest on me??!haha i couldnt help but laugh..oh well..thats my mother for you..slept at 2plus yesterday night..couldnt sleep..anyway got woken up by some drilling thats going on downstairs..it pissed me off..it woke me up!:( i hate to be woken up esp when i was already having a hard time falling asleep the night before..oh well..training later on..yes gona run my guts out and hit the timing he wants..someone take me away from here please.cheers.
here i am once again,torn into a million piece.
Sunday, June 05, 2005
1:52 PM
got home only at 2am yesterday night..mum and i went midnight shopping..and again i didnt get anything..wasnt really in the mood to shop..just wanted to get out of the house thats why i followed..went to marina square..not sure about the speeling but yeah thats where we went to..alot of changes i would say..saw my old time friend rachel who's alot times older then me..we met in pri school and debbie used to wouldnt stop saying i like her cause all i said was'i think she's hot'and debbie agreed but i got the teasing from that ass..haha miss her..yeah anyway yes rachel still look as hot as ever..haha she was working at fin and let's just say..she dont remember me..cause of the change i have from pri school till now..big change..anyway we looked at each other for awhile and she looked away probably thinking why the hell am i looking at her..haha anyway mum is off for more shopping today..was looking through someone's friendster photos then i realise..what i really need now is to go to nz and chill..go to long beach where the waves would hit me hard on my ankles and freezing my lil toes..and i would get cuts from picking shalls cause jed or jazze would fight for it and we would end up running from one end to the other..jazza chasing the gulls..me chasing jazza and jed chasing me..i used to be able to pick jed up..but i dont think i can anymore..he is one big guy now..oh well..maybe in Dec i'll go there and get my long plane ride..i had long car ride yesterday but it wasnt enough..i need a really long one..one that goes from one end of s'pore to the other..yep yep..i also wana go to that big field outside s'pore sports school and lie there thinking about sweet nothings and candid moments watching the stars and maybe with some firefly flying around..but i'll be alone......
imissyoubutitdoesntmatteranymore.
Saturday, June 04, 2005
5:11 PM
woke up at 3am cause cheryl texted me about the papers..haha yes i texted her back with my eyes close and i ended up typing rubbish..haha okay anyway woke up later at 745 with a shock running out of bed and yes i got tangled up badly with my blankie again..i realised i had to be at NIE at 830..haha so i ended up rushing through washing up and had to have my bread in the taxi and i still got there on time:)saw esther..it was good having training with her today..its been ages since i last train with her:)i miss those time where we all would train together as a team..anyway thats besides the point..only 7 girls turn up for the relay training..what a let down it was for both leslie and us..oh well..he treated us to lunch..okay only drinks and fruits..but it was better then nothing..went home with esther later on after lunch and helped mum with the cleaning of the house..my mum is funny alright..she looked at me and was like..your black mabel..haha she's crazy but i still love her..anyway i cant wait for my new layout to be done:)))))okay anyway wings meets starts next week..gona be doing 100m..took my timing for 80m and my timing went down twice:))thats a good sign!:Di cant wait to race..oh well..mum wana go shopping..dad's coming along.............what a let down..argh..they had an issue again just now..hate it when that happens..oh well..mel called today:))talked to her and she hit the spot..i nearly cried talking to her but nope i didnt..maybe tears just filled my eyes..but i was strong..for once..:)
no women,no cry.
4:42 PM
We both know that i shouldn't be here
This is wrong
And baby it's killing me, it's killing you
Both of us trying to be strong
I've got somewhere else to be
Promises to keep
Someone else who loves me
And trusts me fast asleep
I've made up my mind
There is no turning back
She's been good to me
And she deserves better than that
Chorus:
It's the hardest thing
I'll ever have to do
To look you in the eye
And tell you i don't love you
It's the hardest thing
I'll ever have to lie
To show no emotion
When you start to cry
I can't let you see
What you mean to me
When my hands are tied
And my hearts not free
We're not meant to be
It's the hardest thing
I'll ever had to do
To turn around and walk away
Pretending i don't love you
I know that we'll meet again
Fate has a place and time
So you can get on with your life
I've got to be cruel to be kind
Like dr. zhivago
All my love i'll be sending
And you will never know
There can be no happy ending
Chorus
Maybe another time, another day
As much as i want to, i can't stay
(ooh)
I've made up my mind
There is no turning back
She's been good to me
And she deserves better than that
Chorus
I don't want to live a lie
What can i do
Friday, June 03, 2005
10:38 PM
my words were cold and flat and you deserved more.now that your gone i wished i had told you how i really felt..but i guess you've found someone else who could give you what you want without making you wait..i know she'll make you happy..im not making it up but i know it'll turn out that way..sometimes i feel like telling you how i feel and ask if we can start again but i know its not possible so i wont bug you..im a nobody now..i dont even know why im saying all this..but ____i really do miss you..more then you'll ever know..but now to you,thats not important anymore..ill remember the times we had together..esp that long bus ride..you take care now sweet smelling thing..before i end let me say this one last time.iloveyou. "if i could turn time back i promise i would have done all that i wanted.if i could turn time back i would have showed you that i really love you..if i could turn time back i would bring you out to watch the stars..if only i could..but i cant.."
9:42 PM
the burning weather have been melting the nie track:( the one and only track i like..i go there whenever im feeling blue or whenever i feel like running my guts out to stop thinking about anything..today i had training again..have been training everyday this whole week..its not too bad..but i still hate this week..went to school at 10 to rot and wait for simone..she had class till 1030 and i got to school at 945..yeah anyway..have been having really bad headaches lately and i've got a growth growing under my chin..went to the Doc and he gave me some med to bring the swell and stop the pain..he says if by this week it still doesnt go down..it maybe something more..i keep thinking its cancer..or maybe im having the same thing as justina that idiot cousin of mine..oh well..my head still hurts..i wana go for a long ride..now..a long ride which will never end..and i broke my head sets thank you..im so careless and clumsy..i need new ones to blast my ears when im already half deaf..it doesnt matter..i still can hear..didnt feel like eating today..wasnt in the mood for track either..i didnt perform well..my bad..tml im gona go for the relays training..lets just hope im good enough..i got darker today too i think..cause both chu yin and i have our tape mark on our legs..i look even worst now with a line across my shin..that shin of mine have been giving me alot of problem and the pain kills..its like someone hitting your bone with a hammer every 5 sec..oh well..today's work out wasnt tough but damn it i couldnt give all i had..my eyes hurt like fuck shit and rachel keeps going'and i know why'haha that idiot curly hair girl..she tried making me laugh..just like adora with her silly jokes..thanks you girls..thanks zenn,yuxuan and qing ying for asking if im okay.. okay..thanks..and thanks simone that girl followed me around and waited for me today..thanks..i know you werent really happy about it..but thanks..it meant something to me..i've got nothing more to say.cheers...
here's behide these hazel eyes for you.
Seems like just yesterday
You were a part of me
I used to stand so tall
I used to be so strong
Your arms around me tight
Everything, it felt so right
Unbreakable, like nothin' could go wrong
Now I can't breathe
No, I can't sleep
I'm barely hanging on
Here I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes
I told you everything
Opened up and let you in
You made me feel alright
For once in my life
Now all that's left of me
Is what I pretend to be
So together, but so broken up inside
'Cause I can't breathe
No, I can't sleep
I'm barely hangin' on
Here I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes
Swallow me then spit me out
For hating you, I blame myself
Seeing you it kills me now
No, I don't cry on the outside
Anymore...
Here I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes
Here I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes
Thursday, June 02, 2005
10:54 PM
Did I hear you right
'Cause I thought you said
Let's think it over
You have been my life
And I never planned
Growing old without you
Shadows bleeding through the light
Where a love once shined so bright
Came without a reason
Don't let go on us tonight
Love's not always black and white
Haven't I always loved you?
But when I need you
You're almost here
And I know that's
Not enough
But when I'm with you
I'm close to tears
'Cause you're only almost here
I would change the world
If I had a chance
Oh won't you let me
Treat me like a child
Throw your arms around me
Please protect me
Bruised and battered by your words
Dazed and shattered how it hurts
Haven't I always loved you
But when I need you
You're almost here
And I know that's
Not enough
But when I'm with you
I'm close to tears
'Cause you're only almost here
Bruised and battered by your words
Dazed and shattered now it hurts
Haven't I always loved you
But when I need you, you're almost here
,Well I never knew how far behind I'd left you
And when I hold you, you're almost here
Well I'm sorry that I took our love for granted
(Now I'm with you, I'm close to tears
'Cause I know I'm almost here)
Only almost here
8:12 PM
things happen for a reason,reasons you never wana accept.like i said..what i get is the cause of my own doings..and that,i have to face it..but one thing i just dont understand it why must it all hit me at the same time?karma?maybe..but i had my reasons for not showing my true self..when i got news of it i saw it coming..but..i dont know why..i still cried..it wasnt easy trying to control..its not easy to not show my disappointment either..yes its part of life the ups and down..maybe i just need time..i dont have all the time in the world to get myself up and start again..this blow was too big a blow for me..it was what i always wanted..but now its gone..it matters..alot..i dont know what to do..i feel so lost..i maybe surrounded by a million people but truth is i still feel alone..i dont know what to do..im just..lost..so so so lost..what i am is what im pretending to be
simple plan-when im with you
I’m taking my time
I'm trying to leave the memories of you behind
I'm gonna be fine
As soon as I get your picture right out of my mind
I wanna feel the way you make me feel
When I'm with you
I wanna be the only hand
You need to hold on to
But every time I call
You don't have time
I guess I'll never get to call you mine
You’re nothing at all
I know there’s a million reasons why I shouldn't call
With nothing to say
Could easily make this conversation last all day
Another lesson I didn't get to learn
You’re my obsession
I've got nowhere to turn
I wanna be the one you hold on to
12:49 PM
its that passion that keeps me going.
back from the camp..it was..it was bad for me maybe not the rest..my eyes are swollen..but i asked for it..what i get is always because of my own doings..i agree with him..qingying,chee qing and yuxuan came back..i missed them all..talked to them..thanks you girls for being there for me..another person i have to thank is..none other then cheryl..thanks for just being there listening and talking sense into me:)thanks to the rest too..for just asking me to take care..thanks you girls..i wont let you girls down..i'll work hard to get back..i promise..now nothing is more important than my studies..i'll work hard during this holidays..no going out..just gona go for track and study......
now that my dark journey has
started im not gona give up so easily
cause i cant let anyone down
the promise i made shall not be broken
cause of whatever reasons it maybe.
nothing is gona stop me now..only i can help myself.
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